A good relationship is difficult to find. You were one of the lucky ones who managed to find the perfect person and grabbed on tight. Over time, though, things have begun to change. Where there was once non-stop excitement and joy, now there’s uncomfortable silence. Or worse, the painful noise of arguments.
Marriages are difficult relationships to maintain. People change, and sometimes their partner doesn’t change with them. People in a bad relationship are often the most blind to it. If your relationship has felt off, consider these four signs that it may be time to end things.
Tempers flare around each other
Not enjoying being around each other is one of the most telling symptoms of a marriage that is in trouble. It’s a bad sign if you come home in a good mood and suddenly feel it fizzle out when you see your husband. Likewise, if he is having a good time while the two of you are out with his friends and his chipper attitude abruptly ends when it’s just the two of you, there may be a greater problem below the surface.
They are your venting target
There is nothing wrong with needing to get a bad day off your chest, but don’t make them your daily punching bag. Be aware of how much you dump onto your partner and how much it is offset by positive interactions. New couples constantly do things like send each other cute texts and emojis, or call each other on their lunch breaks to say “I love you”. If your chats are mostly venting, consider confiding in friends of family members to ease some of the strain.
Arguments about nothing
When you’re not happy around someone your conversations won’t be either. Intentionally or not, the two of you may find yourselves getting frustrated and having arguments over completely inconsequential things. You hung up his jacket and he didn’t know where it was. He went to the coffee shop before you woke up. It could be time to reassess if things this small result in arguments.
Willfully drifting apart
People often feel the initial spark with someone because they like the same things. Interests change over time, though. Couples often don’t stay current with their spouse’s interests over the years. Many people find that they hardly know the person they married at a certain point, and often, don’t care anymore. It may be time for a change if you and your husband don’t want to actively engage in each other’s interests.